Who said: "It was one of the worst speeches I ever heard ... when a simple apology was all that was required."

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"It was one of the worst speeches I ever heard. The Adams woman told us for an hour how she came to write her beastly book, when a simple apology was all that was required." -- P. G. Wodehouse, The Girl in Blue (1970)

P. G. WodehousePublished in 1970, when he was 89 years old, The Girl in Blue shows P.G. Wodehouse to have retained an enviable degree of lucidity. Not bad for a boy who was born prematurely and spent most of the first 15 years of his life in English boarding schools, seeing his parents (who lived in Hong Kong, where his father was a judge) for about six months in total between the ages of 3 and 15. This was not a particularly unusual scenario for children whose parents worked in the far reaches of the British Empire in locations and climates considered unconducive to the education and health of the young of a certain class. Instead, the young Pelham spent his school vacations with various aunts who are likely the inspiration for the formidable characters who grace the pages of many of his books.

During his 75 year writing career, which ended with his death at the age of 93, Wodehouse wrote 96 books including the popular Blandings Castle and Jeeves & Wooster stories. He also wrote the lyrics for 30 musical comedies - about 250 songs in total; and co-wrote 15 plays.

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Debugging Information
ColdFusion Server Developer 2021,0,13,330286
Template /quotes/detail/index.cfm
Time Stamp 01-Jun-26 01:38 AM
Locale en
User Agent Mozilla/5.0 AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko; compatible; ClaudeBot/1.0; +claudebot@anthropic.com)
Remote IP 127.0.0.1
Host Name 127.0.0.1

Execution Time

Total Time Avg Time Count Template
1780277882400 ms 1.7802778824E+012 ms 1 /root/website/app_server.cfm
134 ms 134 ms 1 top level /root/website/quotes/detail/index.cfm
62 ms 62 ms 1 /root/website/app_layout.cfm
52 ms 52 ms 1 /root/website/app_globals.cfm
38 ms 38 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/dsp_right_column.cfm
27 ms 14 ms 2 /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm
15 ms 15 ms 1 /root/website/adzones/AdZone6.cfm
15 ms 15 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_active_obc.cfm
15 ms 15 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/dsp_footer.cfm
13 ms 13 ms 1 /root/website/adzones/showcase_track.cfm
11 ms 11 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_border_first_impressions.cfm
10 ms 10 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_arcs_for_ad.cfm
9 ms 9 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_quote_by_id.cfm
8 ms 8 ms 1 /root/website/actions/adstatus.cfm
8 ms 8 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_book_giveaway.cfm
7 ms 7 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_competition.cfm
5 ms 2 ms 3 /root/website/actions/act_spider_tracker.cfm
4 ms 4 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_free_newsletters.cfm
4 ms 4 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/dsp_bottom_block.cfm
3 ms 3 ms 1 /root/website/act_check_login.cfm
3 ms 3 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_member_info.cfm
2 ms 2 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_wordplay.cfm
2 ms 2 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/dsp_header.cfm
1 ms 1 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_previous_arcs_for_ad.cfm
1 ms 1 ms 1 /root/website/quotes/detail/dsp_main.cfm
1 ms 1 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/head.cfm
1 ms 1 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/main_menu.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/Application.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/act_libraryIPLogin.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/actions/udfs.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/banners/ad_594.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/formurl2attributes.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/js/fbjavascriptsdk.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_ezine.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_border_booktalk.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_header_newsletter.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_wordplay.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/email_modal.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/google_tags.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/header_announcement.cfm
0 ms 0 ms 1 /root/website/site/blocks/layout/main_search.cfm
3 ms  STARTUP, PARSING, COMPILING, LOADING, & SHUTDOWN
137 ms  TOTAL EXECUTION TIME
red = over 250 ms average execution time

SQL Queries

spidercheck (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=5ms, Records=1) in /root/website/actions/act_spider_tracker.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	a.bot_number
        FROM	bots a
        WHERE	charindex(a.bot_name, ?) > 0
		OR a.bot_ip = ?
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(cf_sql_varchar) = Mozilla/5.0 AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko; compatible; ClaudeBot/1.0; +claudebot@anthropic.com)
Parameter #2(cf_sql_varchar) = 127.0.0.1

get_member_info (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=2ms, Records=0) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_member_info.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
select 	a.*, 
    		b.member_account_type_name, b.member_account_type_charge, b.member_account_type_charge_frequency,  b.member_account_type_months, 
            c.member_chargetype_name, c.member_chargetype_number, a.member_classification_number, a.member_book_format
	
    from members a, member_account_types b, member_chargetype c
	
    where a.member_account_type_number = b.member_account_type_number
	and a.payment_method_id = c.member_chargetype_number
	and a.member_number = ?
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 0

adactive (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=7ms, Records=2) in /root/website/actions/adstatus.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	viewby, section
    FROM	adsystem 
    WHERE	active  = 1 
    AND		start_date <= GETDATE()
    AND 	(viewby = ? OR viewby = 'all')
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = non

get_current_ezine (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=0ms, Records=1, Cached Query) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_ezine.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
select		top 1 ezine_number, ezine_dt, ezine_image, ezine_brief_description, ezine_introduction
from		ezines
where		ezine_active_flag = 1
and 		ezine_type_number = 4
and			ezine_dt < getdate()
order by 	ezine_dt DESC
get_current_wordplay (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=2ms, Records=1) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_wordplay.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT		a.wordplay_number, a.wordplay_dt, a.wordplay_name, a.wordplay_intro_text, b.wordplay_puzzle_number, b.wordplay_puzzle_question
    FROM		wordplays a 
	INNER JOIN	wordplay_puzzle_mapping c on c.wordplay_number = a.wordplay_number
	INNER JOIN	wordplay_puzzles b on b.wordplay_puzzle_number = c.wordplay_puzzle_number
	WHERE		a.wordplay_number = (	select top 1 a.wordplay_number
                                from wordplays a, wordplay_puzzles b, wordplay_puzzle_mapping c
                                where a.wordplay_number = c.wordplay_number
                                and b.wordplay_puzzle_number = c.wordplay_puzzle_number
                                and a.wordplay_dt < getdate()
                                and a.wordplay_expiration_dt > dateadd(day, -1, getdate())
                                order by a.wordplay_dt asc
                                )
get_ComNo (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=0) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_competition.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	TOP 1 	x.competition_number, x.bb_briefs_flag
	from			competitions x
	
		WHERE	x.competition_dt <= getdate()
		AND		x.competition_expiration_dt > dateadd(d,-1,getdate())
get_current_competition (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=0) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_current_competition.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	x.competition_number, x.book_number, x.competition_teaser_title, x.competition_teaser_description, x.competition_intro_text, x.competition_expiration_dt, x.bb_briefs_flag, x.competition_full_info_flag, x.competition_type, x.competition_optin,x.competition_optin_text, 
				a.book_title as "title",
				(b.author_first_name + ' ' +  b.author_middle_initial + ' ' + b.author_last_name) as "author",
	            f.edition_publish_dt AS "hardcover_publish_dt", f.edition_jacket_image as "hardcover_jacket_image",
				g.edition_publish_dt AS "paperback_publish_dt", g.edition_jacket_image as "paperback_jacket_image"
	
		FROM 		competitions x
		INNER JOIN	books a on a.book_number = x.book_number
		INNER JOIN	book_author_mapping c on c.book_number = x.book_number
		INNER JOIN	authors b on c.author_number = b.author_number
		LEFT JOIN	editions f on a.book_number = f.book_number and f.edition_paperback_flag = 0
		LEFT JOIN	editions g on a.book_number = g.book_number and g.edition_paperback_flag = 1

		WHERE		x.competition_number = ?
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 0

get_previous_arcs_for_ad (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=0ms, Records=0, Cached Query) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_previous_arcs_for_ad.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	a.arc_number,a.arc_client_url,a.arc_active_dt, a.arc_off_ad_dt,
		b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_publisher, 
		b.ezine_preview_publish_dt, b.ezine_preview_jacket_desc, b.ezine_preview_number_of_pages, b.ezine_preview_bb_comments, b.ezine_preview_isbn13,
		c.ezine_preview_category_name AS "ezine_preview_category",
		(select count(*) from arc_allocator d where d.arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) as "reviews",
		(select (CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,0))) AS numeric(12,0)))+
				(CASE WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 25 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 50 THEN 0.5
				 WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 50 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 75 THEN -0.5
				 ELSE 0
				 END)
 			from arc_allocator	where arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) AS arcrating,
 			(select (CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,1))) AS numeric(12,1)))from arc_allocator where arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) AS "decrating"

FROM arcs a
INNER JOIN ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number
INNER JOIN ezine_preview_categories c ON b.ezine_preview_category_number = c.ezine_preview_category_number

WHERE arc_closed_flag = 1
AND arc_obc_flag = 0
AND getdate() >= arc_on_ad_dt
AND getdate() < arc_off_ad_dt

ORDER BY a.arc_on_ad_dt DESC
get_future_obc (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=0) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_active_obc.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 		a.arc_forumidfk, a.discourse_flag, a.arc_promo_text, arc_on_ad_dt,
				b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_jacket_desc, b.ezine_preview_publisher, ezine_preview_publish_dt, ezine_preview_number_of_pages, ezine_preview_isbn, ezine_preview_short_summary,
	            b.ezine_preview_bb_author_link, ezine_preview_bb_link
	
	FROM 		arcs a
	INNER JOIN 	ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number
	
	WHERE 		arc_obc_flag = 1

	AND 		getdate() < arc_on_ad_dt
	
		ORDER BY  	NEWID()
get_active_obc (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=4ms, Records=1) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_active_obc.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 		a.arc_forumidfk, a.discourse_flag, a.arc_promo_text,
				b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_jacket_desc, b.ezine_preview_publisher, ezine_preview_publish_dt, ezine_preview_number_of_pages,  ezine_preview_isbn, ezine_preview_short_summary,
	            b.ezine_preview_bb_author_link, ezine_preview_bb_link,
	            c.book_reading_guide
	
	FROM 		arcs a
	INNER JOIN 	ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number
	LEFT JOIN  	books c on c.book_number = b.ezine_preview_bb_link
	
	WHERE 		a.arc_obc_flag = 1
	AND			a.arc_active_flag = 0
	AND 		arc_closed_flag = 1
	AND 		getdate() >= arc_on_ad_dt
	AND 		getdate() < arc_off_ad_dt
	ORDER BY  	NEWID()
get_recent_obc (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=6ms, Records=4) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_active_obc.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 		a.arc_forumidfk, a.discourse_flag, a.arc_promo_text,
				b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_jacket_desc, b.ezine_preview_publisher, ezine_preview_publish_dt, ezine_preview_number_of_pages,  ezine_preview_isbn, ezine_preview_short_summary,
	            b.ezine_preview_bb_author_link, ezine_preview_bb_link,
	            c.book_reading_guide
	
	FROM 		arcs a
	INNER JOIN 	ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number
	LEFT JOIN  	books c on c.book_number = b.ezine_preview_bb_link
	
	WHERE a.arc_number IN (select top 4 arc_number
							from		arcs
							WHERE 		arc_obc_flag = 1
							AND			arc_active_flag = 0
							AND 		arc_closed_flag = 1
							AND 		getdate() > arc_off_ad_dt
							ORDER BY	arc_on_ad_dt DESC)
	ORDER BY  	NEWID()
get_quote_by_id (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=7ms, Records=1) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_quote_by_id.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
select top 1 ezine_number, ezine_quote, ezine_quote_title
from ezines
where ezine_quote_title LIKE (	select ezine_quote_title
								from ezines
								where ezine_number = ?)
order by ezine_number DESC
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 419

get_arcs_for_ad (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=4ms, Records=0) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_arcs_for_ad.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	top 10 a.arc_number,arc_promo_text,
		b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_publish_dt, 
		(select (CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,0))) AS numeric(12,0)))+
				(CASE WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 25 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 50 THEN 0.5
				 WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 50 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 75 THEN -0.5
				 ELSE 0
				 END)
 			from arc_allocator	where arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) AS arcrating

FROM arcs a
INNER JOIN ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number

WHERE arc_closed_flag = 1
AND arc_obc_flag = 0
AND getdate() >= arc_on_ad_dt
AND (select count(*) from arc_allocator d where d.arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) > 1
and getdate() <= dateadd(day,1,a.arc_off_ad_dt)

ORDER BY NEWID()
get_arcs_for_ad (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=4ms, Records=3) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_arcs_for_ad.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	top 3 a.arc_number,arc_promo_text,
			b.ezine_preview_number, b.ezine_preview_title, b.ezine_preview_subtitle, b.ezine_preview_jacket_image, b.ezine_preview_author, b.ezine_preview_publish_dt, 
			(select (CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,0))) AS numeric(12,0)))+
					(CASE WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 25 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 50 THEN 0.5
					 WHEN right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) > 50 AND right(CAST(AVG(CAST(arc_allocator_review_rating AS numeric(12,2))) AS numeric(12,2)),2) < 75 THEN -0.5
					 ELSE 0
					 END)
				from arc_allocator	where arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) AS arcrating

	FROM arcs a
	INNER JOIN ezine_previews b ON b.ezine_preview_number = a.ezine_preview_number

	WHERE arc_closed_flag = 1
	AND arc_obc_flag = 0
	AND getdate() >= arc_on_ad_dt
	AND (select count(*) from arc_allocator d where d.arc_number = a.arc_number and arc_allocator_review_approved_flag = 1) > 1

	ORDER BY a.arc_off_ad_dt DESC
get_ads (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=5ms, Records=0) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT		a.adid,	adweight
	FROM		adsystem a
	INNER JOIN 	ad_category_mapping b ON b.adid = a.adid
	WHERE		a.section = ?
	AND			a.active  = 1
	AND 		a.start_date <= GETDATE()
	
	AND (a.viewby LIKE '%n%' OR a.viewby = 'all')
            

	AND     (b.category_number IN (	SELECT	category_number
									FROM	category_book_mapping
									WHERE	book_number = ?)
      		OR 	b.category_number = ?)
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = adzone6
Parameter #2(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = 0
Parameter #3(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = 0

get_ads (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=1) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	a.adid,	adweight
        FROM	adsystem a
        WHERE	a.section = ? 
        AND 	a.active  = 1 
        AND		a.start_date <= GETDATE()	
        
        AND (a.viewby LIKE '%n%' OR a.viewby = 'all')
        AND (select count(*) from ad_category_mapping where datalength(category_number) >= 1 and adid = a.adid) = 0
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = adzone6

get_type (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=1) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	a.start_date, a.adid, a.end_date, a.camp_views, a.image_name, a.alt_text, a.views, a.code, a.adsize
        FROM	adsystem a
        WHERE	a.adid = ?
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 1112

get_quotes (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=6ms, Records=1) in /root/website/site/blocks/dsp_book_giveaway.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
select top 1 ezine_number, ezine_quote, ezine_quote_title
	    from ezines
	    where len(ezine_quote_title) > 1
	    order by newid()
get_free_newsletters (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=3ms, Records=4) in /root/website/queries/qry_get_free_newsletters.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT 	*
    FROM 	free_newsletters
get_ads (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=7ms, Records=0) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT		a.adid,	adweight
	FROM		adsystem a
	INNER JOIN 	ad_category_mapping b ON b.adid = a.adid
	WHERE		a.section = ?
	AND			a.active  = 1
	AND 		a.start_date <= GETDATE()
		 	AND a.adid NOT IN (?) 
	AND (a.viewby LIKE '%n%' OR a.viewby = 'all')
            

	AND     (b.category_number IN (	SELECT	category_number
									FROM	category_book_mapping
									WHERE	book_number = ?)
      		OR 	b.category_number = ?)
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = showcase_track
Parameter #2(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 1112
Parameter #3(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = 0
Parameter #4(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = 0

get_ads (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=2ms, Records=1) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	a.adid,	adweight
        FROM	adsystem a
        WHERE	a.section = ? 
        AND 	a.active  = 1 
        AND		a.start_date <= GETDATE()	
        		AND a.adid NOT IN (?) 
        AND (a.viewby LIKE '%n%' OR a.viewby = 'all')
        AND (select count(*) from ad_category_mapping where datalength(category_number) >= 1 and adid = a.adid) = 0
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_VARCHAR) = showcase_track
Parameter #2(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 1112

get_type (Datasource=bookbrowse_com_new, Time=0ms, Records=1) in /root/website/adsystem/adsystem_mod.cfm @ 01:38:02.002
SELECT	a.start_date, a.adid, a.end_date, a.camp_views, a.image_name, a.alt_text, a.views, a.code, a.adsize
        FROM	adsystem a
        WHERE	a.adid = ?
Query Parameter Value(s) -
Parameter #1(CF_SQL_INTEGER) = 594

Scope Variables

CGI Variables:
AUTH_PASSWORD=
AUTH_TYPE=
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