Book Club Discussion Questions
For supplemental discussion material see our Beyond the Book article, and our BookBrowse Review of If I Am Missing or Dead.
Please be aware that this discussion guide will contain spoilers!
Introduction
In a memoir that is by turns harrowing and humorous, Janine Latus recounts both
her own and her sister Amy's dealings with men, beginning with their father.
From the traumatic childbirth experiences of their mother to the daily reminders
from their father that their looks are what matter most, both Janine and Amy
take away from their childhood's a sense that, as young women, they are
unworthy, even sinful, by nature. In spite of their strength, intelligence, and
strong bond with each other, both Janine and Amy find themselves trapped in
relationships with abusive and controlling men. Fortunately, Janine is able to
escape this cycle. Amy, however, does not.
If I Am Missing or Dead explores issues faced by all women in our society
and particularly by those who have experienced physical or emotional abuse.
Janine's story vividly illustrates the wide spectrum of abusive behavior and
depicts the cycle of self-doubt that can lead smart, attractive women to remain
in abusive relationships.
If I Am Missing or Dead is also the story of a
woman finding her voice and making sense of her own story: for herself, for her
sister, for women everywhere.
Questions for Discussion:
- Why do you think Janine chose to tell her own story alongside Amy's
story?
- Both Amy and Janine have troubled relationships with their bodies. While
Amy struggles with her weight, Janine seems to be addicted to exercise and
weight loss. How do the sisters' respective difficulties with body image
affect their relationships? Where did these problems originate?
- When she is twelve years old, Janine is attacked and nearly raped by a
neighbor, Mr. Johnston. Examine her parents' responses to this event. What
messages do these responses send?
📖
Get the full reading guide
Join BookBrowse free to unlock all 14 discussion questions, author background, themes, and more for If I Am Missing or Dead.
Join free — it takes 30 seconds
Already a member? Log in →
- How does the author develop themes of identity and belonging throughout the narrative?
- What role does the setting play in shaping the characters' decisions and relationships?
- Discuss how the ending reframes the events of the story. Were you surprised?
Unless otherwise stated, this discussion guide is reprinted with the permission of Simon & Schuster.
Any page references refer to a USA edition of the book, usually the trade paperback version, and may vary in other editions.